My roommate and I, despite our shared love for junk food and frozen, have what seems like very different dietary habits.
As with many roommate pairs, we initially bought groceries to share. We thought, hey, this way if he wanted to cook some of the chicken he can without worrying. If I wanted to drink some of the milk that will be no problems. Turns out, this was quite inefficient as these things just don’t happen.
My roommate does not cook anything except fry bacon to make his sandwiches, though he has now taken some of my frozen waffles and had that as breakfast. My roommate only drink diet soda and drinks, but I really can’t do drinks with fake sugar. It just does not taste at all real. I can do skim milk (sorry, Ron Swanson) but I can’t do Diet Coke, Coke Zero, Pepsi Max, you name it.
I, on the other hand, insist on varying my diet. I will try to buy different meats, different vegetables to cook, perhaps pairing it with rice, noodles or salad. My roommate will say that this was not worth the “effort to calories ratio” as compared to the sandwiches, even though I guarantee you I don’t make fancy gourmet dishes. I’m just trying to improve my basic culinary repertoire.
So as of now we’ve agreed to buy food separately – as in the words of my roommate “the union of what we eat is very small.” If anyone understands set theory, imagine that Venn diagram. Only Bacon, Milk, Ham, Cereal and Bread are in the Union of the groups of what we eat.
I’d put ice cream in that group too – only if I get to it before he does!
My roommate is a gamer. He plays League of Legends, amongst many other games. I generally hear him from my side of the apartment, which isn’t that small, with all the doors closed. I guess good headphones and your own virtual world makes you forget about how loud you can be at times.
So knowing this, a story was shared to me by a college friend, jokingly, that he should enroll in the video game addiction program featured in this article by NPR.
The article is definitely worth a read, if you have a friend, sibling, or child who plays a lot of video games, though I’m not sure if there really is need for a complete rehabilitation program. Though there are some signs I have seen… many from my roommate.
Instead of keeping it from my roommate, I share it with him, knowing that he’d be humored by the premise of the article. He, however, says he doesn’t think the program is worth it.
Why, I ask. Do you not see yourself an addict? Do you not agree with the signs?
“Nah, not that,” he says. “I’ll just relapse.”
I may have mentioned the my roommate and I love our frozen pizza. It’s one of those things we do together once every few weeks, the few times I get himself out of his room to eat at the dining table with me.
Well, we did that last Sunday, and I noticed that he doesn’t throw out his empty Sprite Zero can, nor the dirty paper towels he used. Now, I could easily have picked up after him, but that wouldn’t be helping him learn would it, so I decided I’d leave it be.
The next few days I see the same pile at the edge of the dining table, untouched. I often would be eating my meals next to it, and I wonder, how long it would be till he would realize that this mess was his. I decided I would make this an experiment, to see how long it would be till he figures it out and cleans it, or till I crack.
It sits for over 120 hours… before I return with a few drinks in me and call him out on it.
“Dude… you realize your trash is still on the table since Sunday night?!? It’s almost Friday!”
“Well, at least it’s not months yet…” was the reply. Don’t get me started on his room.
So I guess the experiment shows this – my tolerance for a mess is much lower than his.
Well, not really, he’s here in the room next to me, except he’s never awake when I am!
Last Sunday, as I was about to leave for breakfast at about 8.30am, I heard my roommate turn in to sleep. At about 6.30pm, as I was about to start cooking dinner, he wakes up to join me for our meal – Frozen Pizza. Surprisingly delicious, and relatively cheap! (recommended for the lazy).
I don’t think much of it, knowing that my roommate hags to work the following day. I wake up on Monday at around 9, remember I am a student, so this is reasonable, and I see my roommate up coming out of hsi room. Everything is still normal, even though he is a little late.
“Hey, aren’t you supposed to be ready for work?” I ask.
“Oh, I’m not going, I called in sick today,” he said.
“You alright, man?” I check.
“Yeah, I just didn’t get any sleep last night.”
“Oh, how come?”
His reply caught me by surprise.
“I just haven’t slept yet….”
I first thought it would be nice not to have my roommate around for a while. And it was to start. The place was cleaner, quieter, smelled nicer and just a little more habitable. But being used to the rowdy residence halls of a college, where I knew most of the people on the floor, it is awfully quiet to return to a dark apartment.
So I ask you, US Congress, to give me my roommate back. I will take his mess, the smell of his one pair of shoes, his loud bass in his nocturnal hours, just to have some company while I study for classes.
Also, it’s hard to maintain a blog about my roommate when he’s not here…!
I did not mean to make this blog at all political, but when it concerns my roommate I think it becomes fair game. In the interest of privacy I will only say that my roommate works for a national agency which was deemed “non-essential” for funding. This has meant he has not had to go to work for the last few days.
This has also meant that he is able to reject all forms of a socially acceptable schedule in terms of time and sleep, and also meant that he has not had to move further than the 20ft necessary to get from his bedroom to the kitchen.
It was quite humorous to see how this played out. Tuesday, he was woken up at a reasonable 9.30am by his boss to inform him of their situation. He declared that he planned to leave to go home to visit his parents on Wednesday, but changed his mind with the fear that the shutdown would end before the weekend, forcing him to return. Thursday, he would have woken up about 4pm, at which point his excuse for not leaving then was rush hour. Finally, on Friday, as I was about to start cooking dinner at about 6.30pm, he wakes up, takes a shower and leaves. I guess sleeping at 6am would do that to you. It’s the same timezone as certain parts of Asia!
I had assumed the few hours I had been back in the apartment that he had already left. He even slept through a visit from the maintenance crew to repair the air-conditioner of our apartment!
I feel he would have stayed in his unique routine if there was more food in our fridge, but he had devoured all the sandwich meats (all he eats) in the four days of hibernation he had.
Please, US government, for the sake of my roommate, please give him something to do….!
My roommate provided some terrific insight to me the other day. It surprised me as he really doesn’t have a lot of experience in this issue – women.
And I don’t mean to offend anyone writing this.
We were talking about a situation I was involved in and I had found I received more attention from other women in recent years, despite the fact that they know I have a long-term girlfriend. I joked that the steps to get a girl’s attention were simple. They are as follows.
Step 1 – Get a girlfriend.
This elicited some laughs, but he then made the crucial point. He pointed out that I may be receiving more attention due to the struggles in my current relationship.
“Girls are like sharks,” he said. “They can smell blood. When they sense something wrong, they pounce.”